Mystery Cartridge SNES Game - Chrono trigger 2? RARE

Check this comedy ebay auction out. It's amazing.

Let me quote you the description because anything I would right would detract from the genius.

WHAT IN THE HELL?
This auction is for an unlabeled (HYPER RARE) Super Nintendo cartridge. The whereabouts of this cartridge's origin is entirely unknown. The contents of the cartridge are an absolute mystery. The only hint we have on the contents of this cartridge is the name "MAITLAND NANCARROW" which are found to be written on the back of this treasure in some sort of dark black ink. Could this engraving mean "DESTROY IMMEDIATELY, PROTECT MANKIND" in some foreign language? I'm not sure.


Heres a picuture of this cartridge:





The auctioneer continues to speculate, what the cartridge could possibly contain:

A Chrono trigger 2 prototype? stolen from square soft before the game plans were terminated. THE ORIGINAL super smash brothers? the one that was supposed to be released on the Super Nintendo. Custer's Revenge 2?! A sequel to the most controversial game ever.


The continues to inform us that his life is in damage from non other the Lord Nintendo, who will stop at nothing to get his secret cartridge back. The Lord has just happened to have signed an incredible certificate of authenticity:





The best part is the cock signiture:



I'm definitely going to try and cram that in to mine signature some how....ohhh Jesus, I am starting to write like a Carry on film. I hate it when that happens.

Lord Nintendo is even so bold as to demand the return of his cartridge on the questions and comments section.

THIS IS LORD NINTENDO. RETURN THAT CARTRIDGE TO ME (at area 64) IMMEDIATELY, OR FEEEELLLLL MYYYY WRATHHHH


The new luck owner of this SUPER RARE cartridge is "nshulla"...

You see, spend a little time writing a comedy auction and you to could sell something that’s worth about $4, for $40.

I'm not lying, check the auction out for yourself.

Lost Seaon 4 Episode 5: Sneak Peak

AND NOW A SNEAK PEAK FROM AN ALL NEW LOST

Oh god, oh god, oh god….It’s a Desmond episode!

“The Constant”, that sounds like time travel to me, I can’t bloody wait. Lets have a look:





Seems to confirm my idea that time travels differently and that you would probably get to the boat in a day and a bit.





Woah, they get the boat, and Dezzy has gone crazy! Are these the side effects they were talking about?

Mental

This looks like a fecking amazing episode!!!!!! I’m properly excited about this, I better text Lee he will be loving this.

Love and Limbo: When are computer games considered art?

This is a question has been thrown around a lot recently. Apparently a dead sheep in a box is considered art, but a computer game that can touch you on an emotional level, and just genuinely looks amazing isn’t. Its utter maddness.

The bigger problem is how games are perceived by our ageing population. They seem to think it perfectly acceptable to sit down in front of mind dissolving soap all night, but then they have the gall to question you when you spend more the 30 minutes playing a computer game, and not joining in with their vigil in front of the twat box.

Charlie Brooker seems to be the only sensible voice on TV when it comes to defending our genre. A rare visionary in a sea of absolute idiots.





The BBC are the worst offenders when it comes to games coverage. Their ridiculously ill informed views on gaming actually make me sick to my stomach. I literately shout abuse at the TV when I see some of their reports.

"A computer game will never beat a good book"

That sentence was actually uttered by a BBC reporter when discussing the Wii...I MEAN COME ONE, HOW OUT OF TOUCH ARE YOU!

Phew, I just need to take a moment to catch my breath.

Anyway back to games and art. Here are two examples of what I consider art. They are both made by independent gaming companies, as the creatives in the industry tend to gravitate there.

Love

Little is now about this game, except that it’s a little bit like a MMORPG, little bit like a FPS, and a little bit like an adventure game. Sounds sweet huh?







I’m assuming that these are just bits concept work, but if they try and keep this visual style then I think it will be an incredibly impressive game. One that I will definitely be seeking out for purchase.

Limbo

Again, little is know about this game. I’m guessing that it’s a platformer that will probably appear on the PC, it Might turn up on Xbox Live. But it's worth going to their site and watching the trailer.







I think at some point in the future, games will come of age. It will probably be with my generation. I’m 24, my brother is 31 and we are still in to gaming. We refuse to give up something that we enjoy just because it is seen as immature.

FUCK YOU OLD PEOPLE, AND FUCK YOU BBC!

Phew, rant over!

The Lost Initiative: Season 4 Episode 4

The episode wasn't that interesting; the podcast was a laugh though. I got to swear and they kept it in woohoo.

That crazy guy who phoned in and had a mental break down made us laugh. Properly lost the plot, he nearly came up with some gold so I will fill in what I think he missed.

This was the video he was talking about:




(This is the rabit video that I keep on posting...I just love it so much)


The other caller mentioned two things from too different dimensions can't exist in the same time and space. I think he was nearly right, this video shows that they are sending stuff back and forward in time. The smoke monster is a sort of course correction. So if things start existing in two time periods simultaneously, it kills the one that shouldn’t be there.

So that rabbit would be on the smoke monsters list. It might also mean that Eko had some how travelled in time. Also that would mean Desmond might be in some serious trouble with Mr S. Monster.

Apparently the next episode is about Dezzy, and might have some more time travel business in it....GET IN!!!

A first visit to the Black Temple

I've been playing this game for a while and I think I'm getting closed to finishing it...

The Black Temple is the last Dungeon in the Blizzards The Burning Crusade, and is the culmination of a year playing this game. You see, the problem with me and games is that once I have started them, I'm utterly compelled to complete them...and I let little stand in my way. Especially when I can brag to my friends and say things like "Something like 10% of the 10,000,000 subscribers get to see this place..."





Of course this doesn't justify playing it really... I do feel incredibly nerdy when I do play it, but the nerd factor, weighed against the my need to complete games has really only had one winner - the need is far to strong.

This rant has made my sounds more of a geek then you probably thought I was - maybe not, but I thought I was say it has I'm going to try and cover more of the most popular online game the world has ever seen.

So I was talking about the Black Temple...





Yup, this at the present time is the pinnacle of this game. All the story's you have been apart of finish in this place... you are up against one of the biggest characters in the world of Lawcraft and his home really doesn't disappoint.





You and 25 other friends take the role of an invading force. You enter at the bottom through a crack in the wall and slowly make your way higher in the temple. And as you getter higher the music becomes more epic - Lord of the rings Epic.

Your goal is a half demon half elf fallen hero called Iilidan. Hes a nasty piece of work and to add to your problems hes as mad as a hatter. There are load of his mates till kill before you get to him so its not an easy task to put in mildly.

My role is to heal people, its gets affectionately called "wac-a-mole" as I have to time my heals to stop people reaching zero health.

I get to look at these bars all day:





Then I get to press these buttons...in the right order so people don't die:





The problem is that people don't make my life easy, especially against bosses that look like this:





Oh, by the way this is me...hello





I will stop playing soon, definitely very soon. Well...there is a new expansion pack coming out. I might stop at the end of that. You can't do things half arsed, you have to see them through to the end. I need to complete it, all of it. I must appease the gaming need.

X-Files 2: Get back to your old school, back to your roots.





By that of course I mean your geeking roots and this is most definitely mine. There are many reasons why X-files 2 should suck, but you know it just isn't. Something to do with the timing, the current movie climate, just trust me my spidey-senses are tingling and this is gonna be sweet.

Sweet.

Alone in the Dark 5: the dark gets scary...again.




Mr Geek has been having some nostalgia trips recently, and then I saw this and had one of my own.

I remember the original Alone in the Dark, the whole creepy Lovecraft story and the graphics of a cubist nightmare. I played that game to hell and back, hours of joy. Of course it did take a large portion of your day just to fire a gun at the almost motionless monsters, but screw that you can't beat childhood memories like that.

Then I see this and there's stuff with lights and that physics juju going on. I did a sex wee, I don't mind admitting that. If the story is still messed up and this game play really is this good you can screw nostalgia I'll take next-gen any day. So I'm fickle.

Sweet

FEZ and other independent games

Gaming innovation doesn’t really come along that often but when it does its one of those things that I think has to be savoured. I also think that it’s the responsibility of the people in the know to spread the word about these gems, be it word of mouth or via a blog post.

So meet Pez. Don’t let the first minute of this trailer fool you; it fooled me. I thought this was just a clip from an old Snes game. Oh boy was I wrong.

Take a look:



(It's basically Paper Mario on crack)

From what I can gather the game will be launched on the Xbox live Arcade where hopefully this independent developer will receive some of the much earned profits. Apparently this game was built using XNA software. According to microsoft its “a powerful next-generation software development platform. XNA empowers developers to deliver breakthrough games while combating rising production costs and ever-increasing hardware complexity”

Hopefully this means a whole new generation of independent games companies will be able to sell their wares to a wider audience. Much like the internet did for up and coming rock bands...the next few years could be the start of a influx of new independent games.

Here are some others that I know about and are worth checking out:

Crayon Physics
Aquaria
Cloud

Diary of the dead: George A Romero's dead wrong about web zombies

Let me make something clear straight away. George A Romero is a peerless filmmaker. He is the Orson Welles of horror movies. Night Of The Living Dead, Dawn Of The Dead, Day Of The Dead and Land Of The Dead are all masterful satires. Not only does he scare you half to death, but in each film Romero homes in like a sniper on society's ills at the time of making. Night Of The Living Dead presented us with a black hero at a time when the civil rights movement was shaking 60's America. Dawn Of The Dead cast a mirror on all of the mindless consumer zombies of the 70's (who remain undead to this day). Day Of The Dead foretold the age of genetic engineering. Finally, Land Of The Dead shows us as a fortresss society in the wondeful 00's, hiding from terrorist zombies and deluding ourselves that this is living.

So what of Diary Of The Dead in 2008? What does Romero think of us right now? Well, once again sees us for what we are. He goes after exactly the right theme, the 24 hour online society that demands to be entertained every second of the day and then blogs about it to its friends. The only problem is that for the first time in his zombie career, the message overwhelms the storytelling.

Diary Of The Dead introduces us to a gang of students, who decide to document the zombie holocaust by filming everything and uploading it online. They discover that the camera blunts the experience, it shields them from the horror they're filming. Unfortunately, Romero allows this to happen to his audience as well. Maybe this was his intention, to show us that we've all become so desensitised to armageddon that we wouldn't feel it even if it happened right in front of us, but it doesn't make for a fantastic film. An annoying voice over hits us over the head with the film's theme again and again. The remarkable Cloverfield demonstrates that simply allowing the user-generated video to tell it's own tale works so much better. You can't help feeling that Romero would have been better off following the same principle.

I feel like a heritic for saying this, but Diary Of The Dead also feels like the time your dad tried to explain the internet to someone. Everyone knows that an event like this would be documented entirely on YouTube, but the site never really makes an appearance in the movie. Any video shot by the students on their mobile phones is shown in patronising minature. At one point, the hero of the story marvels that his zombie clips have received "70,000" hits on MySpace. In an age when the release of a GTA4 trailer melted the internet, the zombie appocalypse would draw millions of plays from our bored every second of the day society. For the first time in his incredible career, Romero shows his age.

Don't get me wrong, Diary Of The Dead isn't a bad film. Compared to the worthless Saw and Hostel franchises, this is fantastic. Unfortunately, Romero can only be compared to Romero. And the standard is just so high...

The Zelda Phantom Hour Glass Music Mystery

I was looking back at some really really old games, because I'm a nostagic kinda guy and I came across this. This is the end sequence of a game called Ultima Underworld The Stygian Abyss and it came out of the PC. It was one of those RPG games that came on 100 disks...or one CDRom if you were rich; we unfortunately had the disk version.





Is it just me or is the music at 1 minute 30 seconds incredibly familiar. You see, I have started playing Zelda the Phantom Hour Glass on my DS and the music from it has been itched in to my skull.

So when I heard the ending theme tune, I thought to myself, "hang on somethings up here!"

So, have a listen to this:





Now you don’t have to be a rocket scientist to pick up the similar themes in the tune.

I put it do you Nintendo that you have ripped off Ultima's score and placed it in one of your biggest franchises (Sorry I have been playing Phoenix Write – Ace Attorney too)

Coincidence or blatant plagiarism, there’s only one way to find out...FIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGHT

UPDATE:

Yes, it seems I have made a rather embarrassing mistake. But in stead of deleting this and pretending it never happened. I'm going to revel in my own stupidity and invite you to leave your insulting messages; GO ME.

Lost Season 4 Episode 4: Sneak Peak

Looks like Ben is pressing all the right buttons.



Hey, wasn’t that same room Locke’s dad was held in...nice link there.

Sawyer almost looks respectable, its crazy times we live in.



Kate, she’s a nasty piece of work.

Knight Rider 2008

Yup, they have remade Knight Rider and it’s on tonight in America.

I will be getting my grubby hands on this even If I have to breaks a few laws in the process...shhh don’t tell anyone.

Its not a new plot it’s a continuation of the old show. Yes that’s right, there is a Son of Hoff!

They have made a 2 hour pilot, similar to the Battlestar so don't expect more episodes until it gets the green light from the studio.




Hmmm, Kit is a Mustang...

I better watch it before I start slating it...its only fair.

Here is the offical site, check out the picture from the launch party...hmmmmmmm ladies...!!!

The Lost Initiative: Season 4 Episode 3

Crazy episode...it melted my brain. On a side note I made it in on time this week.

We had some rather interesting callers this week.

*** I know some people hate spoilers and I know one of the callers talks about the episode 8 and reveals who its about. So stop around 11.00 and forward to 13.00 if your that bothered, ***

The first guy’s Michael theory is a great thought. There is alot of evidence in previous episodes to back it up so I’m acctually going to bet money on this happening. It’s a bit of a spoiler that I’m sure the die hard fans will complain about which is fair enough. If Michael is the man on the boat then it means Walt must be there too. I’m not sure if there is any proof that Walt is coming back this series in his more physical form though.

Anyway heres a link to the mobile cast he spoke of:




The other guys and Ian’s pole reversal idea was good. We all know theres something magnetic going on. We know there is a station at one of the poles so you don’t have to take a giant leap in imagniation for this to be relevant.


Here is a cool little animation of the pole reversing over 1000 years...not 100 ahahaha.

Click here for the pole reversal thingy

Last but by no means least. Here is something we had a joke about while we were watching the show.


Good shot (Real life footage):


Bad shot (Studio footage):


Laters

R.I.P. HD-DVD

Well we have barely even seen the format war in the UK but it seems it is already over. Toshiba have announced after loosing the support of Wal-Mart amongst others, that they will no longer be producing the HD-DVD.

Everything I have read on the matter has always said that HD-DVD is the better more economical choice, so why has it lost? I think Sony are big ass scary company with lots of tricks up there sleeves. Now all they have to do is get there damn asses in gear and get some decent titles out Blu-Ray, oh and cut a few hundred pounds of the damn thing.

Check out story HERE.

Batman: Gotham Knight - First Look




This worked for Star Wars and it worked for The Matrix, in fact I'm not giving those animated works of art their dues. They were awesome because manga and animation of this type work so well in the action genre.

Well they've done it with Batman now, Gotham Knight is a collection of stories much like the Animatrix. Anyway why am I telling you just watch the video.

Lost Season 4 Episode 3: Has been seen...

Apparently another great episode which is brilliant news. It seems that they have condensed the plot down in to some great episodes this season.

So one good thing has come out of the writers strike, Lost episodes that bash straight to the point.

Theres a twist at the end of this episode that I will apparently never guess.

I will have a go and lets see how close I get...

Sayid,

He can't be trusted.

He's been working with Ben all along!

Answers are coming, and probably sooner than you think.

Ain't sure if the Geek himself has already communed with this particular grapevine as of yet but thought I would slap it up here before he does for just a brief momentary feeling of beating the little weasel at his own game.

You may of heard the writers strike has ended, hoorah. Mad props to those guys for sticking it out (did I just say that?). This means all those shows we love are going to be back in business. I had been unsure as to the effect the strike had on Lost, so here it is.

The oh so annoying and smug ad campaign - "Answers are Coming" - is going to come true much quicker than originally thought. When the season started airing they had 8 eps in the bag, Carlton Cuse exec producer and show co-runner has announced that they will produce a further 5 eps to complete the fourth season.

Thats 13 episodes for those mathematically impaired. This could be the first Lost season were there isn't a completely redundant episode that makes me want to puke my balls up in frustration.

Sweet.

Lost Season 4 Episode 3: Sneak Peak

Heres a little looky at the new episode scheduled for this Sunday...





I have a feeling Charlotte is the Bens man/women on the boat...





hmmm so Hurley is now with Jack's group....interesting Mr Bond!!!

E4's Soul Slapper Reaper Game...AMAZING

E4 have cleverly teamed up with the guys over at Weebl’s stuff to create this crazy game for Reaper (that show by Kevin Smith)

Soul Slapper



I’m in the business of web games and I have to say that this is something pretty cool. It’s a simple point and click shooter, but its special move is genius. You can send your own pictures in to E4 and they will actually put you in the game. I won't mention the music, I will let you discover its genius by yourself.

I’m going to send one in off me, Iain and Paul.

So if you fancy shooting a crazy laser at us then stay tuned.

High five E4 we are very impressed.

"Look at me shooting the demon, right in the face...he didn't even see em' coming. Coz I'm dead good at this!"

Something wicked this way comes.

When I was younger one of my best friends mum worked in a video shop, back when videos came on videos. We were both absolute horror nuts, still am. We watched, in single sittings, the whole of some of the best horror movies series ever created. Friday 13th, Nightmare on Elm St, The Howling, Evil Dead(repeatedly).

I say this to express just how bat shit crazy I am about horror movies.

The rise of Asia extreme has been a real joy, those guys are some of the most screwed up movie makers ever and I love them for it. Then of course Hollywood got their dirty mitts on it and, well...you know Lennie Small from Of Mice and Men (played wonderfully by John Malkovich in the movie adaptation)? Thats Hollywood and the Asian horror movie is the tiny, cute little mouse he likes to carry and eventually crushes cause he's dumb too comprehend what he's doing might hurt the tiny mouse.

Anyway, I digress.

My hot tip for this year, the new pro in the horror movie market, its a little out of left wing, Finland. No I have not gone mad.

Heard about a film a while ago, from a guy called AJ Annila who directed the first Finnish martial arts movie, Jade Warrior, I have that one on order. His latest film is called Sauna, and yes it refers to the sweat box. It is in fact about Finnish sauna culture in an area between Christianity and paganism. Yup, its a horror movie about a sauna, this is blowing my mind, let it blow yours:

Bronson Club Teaser

Next up I am yet again unsure how the hell to process this. Anyone know Lordi? The prosthetic laden rockers of Eurovision fame. Oddly enough they have a film coming out, yup, you heard right. It's called Dark Floors, before you think I've gone mad check out the trailer:

Dark Floors Trailer

Thats actually looks, and I'm scared when I say this, good. Admittedly the bit were Lordi show up looks a tad on the trouser stain side but the rest looks so promising I just have to give a try.

A final film not from the bizarre land of Finland(to much land?). This is the latest helping from Robert Englund, a true horror legend. Jack Brooks is a plumber, but his life's about to get turned upside down when his professor friend(Englund) accidentally swallows a demon heart, oops. He used to be a plumber, now he's Jack Brooks Monster Slayer:

Jack Brooks Monster Slayer

Sweet

Lost Season 4 Episode 2 : Things you might of missed

Check out this picture...



Looks like a suitcase, I can't see what's in it but it's just before they find the crashed plane. Here is a zoomed in version...



Everything is normaly relevent in this show so this must be something...but what, thats question.

Anyway, lets move on to something more interesting. Everyone loves Eko, I know I was sad to see him get bumped off. I even interviewed him...

So you can understand my excitement at this photo.


This is taken from the house, Ghostbuster Miles went to and stole the drugs and money (the swine). Hopefully Eko will be making a return to reclaim his money and drugs. That would be amazing.

The Lost Initiative Season 4 Episode 2

I turned up late again, maybe because I was enjoying the weather too much...



I this was a much better episode, I think we were all in agreement. We seemed more in to it when we were watching and we seemed alot more up for a chat when we walked down to the studio, and it turned out to be one of our better episodes...Lee had a cold but he was been very professional and coughing away from the mic.

We also had our first international caller...I think.

He wasn’t lying about this Vile Vortices theory, it actually exists. I did a bit of investigation afterwards on wikipedia after the podcast.

So here we go; by controlling these portals you can travel between them, there are twelve of these portals depicted in this map I got off Wikipedia.



Is this an experiment using them?





Here’s a direct extract from Wikipedia because I’m too lazy to type it out.

“In 1973, a Soviet science magazine published a more detailed version of the theory (Hitching, 1978). Three scientists, Nikolai Goncharov, Vyacheslav Morochov and Valery Makarov, in the article "Is the Earth a large Crystal?" in Khimya i Zhizn, posited "a matrix of cosmic energy" covering the Earth, made up of twelve pentagonal plates. The junctions of any three of these plates (62 junctions in all) had, they claimed, strange properties. For instance, several were sites of advanced prehistoric cultures, such as at Mohenjo-Daro, Egypt and Peru; and some areas had much unique wildlife, for example at Lake Baikal.”

I have to say that this makes a lot of sense. There’s a portal in Antarctica where the crazy Russian station was, and there’s one in Africa where they found the bear bones. Maybe we have discovered one of Lost’s big secrets.

Now on to the whispers...

I have been listening to that part and to be very honest I couldn’t hear a single thing that the guys where discussing; it just sounded like a load of people making up sounds. I have a feeling that it’s probably just the producers and the sound guys mucking around with us and as usual we all fall hook line and sinker for it.

and finally I have a message for you ANDREWS!

SMELL MY CHEESE YOU MOTHER





Have a listen here...

The Lost Initiative Season 4 Episode 2

We've got another random comment on itunes from those Lostcast people...they really don't like us. Shame.

Lost Season 4 Episode 2: Has been seen...

Apparently there are 3 new characters...

My mate said it was far better then episode 1 which I think we all found a bit boring, so I'm dead excited about watching this one.

I now will give you clues in the form a Triptych, or a set of 3 photos for you idiots out there.

(It makes this post look a lot bigger then it really is)








***WARNING THIS POST MAY SEEM TO CONTAIN MORE CONTENT THEN THERE REALLY IS***

Lost Season 4 Episode 2: Sneak peaks...

I found these on YouTube and I couldn't resist watching them. It looks like Sunday's episode is shaping up to be a cracker.

Sneak Peak 1




Sneak Peak 2




Can't bloody wait.

Lost Season 4 Episode 1: Things you might of missed

Here are some rather interesting screen shots from last Sundays show.

Is this Hurley’s unconscious mind trying to rid itself of the guilt it must be feeling for abandoning the other passengers on the island.


Or is it the island manifesting itself in an attempt to get Hurley to return.

Is Hurley the key?

Does he return without Jack and Kate?

Does the Island start showing itself to beared Jack?

Who the fuck knows...I know I don't.



This guy looks like Jacks dad to me.

Hackers of the world unite!

There's a war going on. A war of information, of the digital.

A group of Hackers known as Anonymous have thrown down the gauntlet to the "church" of Scientology following the alleged forced removal of the recent Tom Cruise video on YouTube.

Amongst many things my personal favourite is the hacking of Google so that Scientology is the first hit when you type the search "dangerous cult".

For the full story click here to be sent to the amazing Telegraph...sorry bad link.

In the interests of a rounded debate here's another view on the group that paints a different picture. Note however this is Fox news, legendary for their "ethics" in reporting facts. I think the menacing music is particularly great:


There's no way your having a top ten monster movie list without my input!!

Don't make me come down there and slap you Tom!

Everyone knows there are strict rules when constructing a top ten of anything, I mean how can you go from man-in-a-suit monster movies to the claustrophobic horror of The Thing?

Are we including classics like Frankenstein, Dracula, The Wolf Man? Incidentally on a sweetly geeky note there is a remake in the works for The Wolf Man to be directed by Joe Johnston. For those lower on the geeking scale he designed Boba Fett (Sweet) and directed awesome films like Jumanji and The Rocketeer (don't care what you say that film rocked).

Ok, glad I got that off my chest, you may continue.

Ooh what about The Blob, or The Fly...

GET INFECTED - Resident Evil Extinction on DVD

It's not often I get excited about advertisement campaigns but this one is pretty special. To celebrate the DVD release of Resident Evil Extinction on 18th February. Sony has created this wicked competition.

Go here:

www.residentevilextinctiondvd.co.uk

Create your own zombie...
Your Zombie will be placed in a pen with load of other peoples zombies.



Feed it and exercise it to make your new un-dead friend stronger. Now this is the cool bit, when the count down clock on the site reached zero, your zombie and all the others will be unleashed into homepage takeover ads across a load of sites. These are the annoying ads that fill the screen, but this time they are worth watching.

You will get told which site your Zombie is one via a handy email. Then throughout the day, Alice (the main protagonist of Resident Evil Extinction) will kill them off at random. The more you trained your friend the more chance he has of surviving.

NOW GO GET YOUR ZOMBIE ON…

(and watch out of the un-dead Geeky Tom)

Top 10 Monster Movies - Part 1

Thanks to JJ Abrams, monsters are back in vogue. So what are the heavyweight creature features of all time?

Godzilla (1954)

The greatest of all the monsters - because a man in a rubber suit trashing a model village is always amazing - Godzilla first invaded Tokyo in 1954. Born in the radiation of nuclear tests, he serves as a warning against man's delight in inventing increasingly effect ways of killing himself.

Has there ever been a more hyperbolic trailer than for the American version of the film? Orson Welles serves up a voiceover of monsterous proportions. And you all thought Clovefield was over-hyped.





Cloverfield (2008)

Rightly praised by the critics, and rightly hated by morons raised on a diet of Michael Bay subtlety. They say, "I just wanted the camera to pull back and then swoop around New York, so that I could get a proper look at the beast". I say, "Hud's shooting it on foot for God's sake".

The monster itself is an awesome titan of a thing. Doom-inspired in nastiness, indestructible and in town to kick-ass. What's not to like.






Destroy all Monsters (1968)

Now this is the mother of all monster rumbles, as the clip below demonstrates. In the distant future of 1999, evil aliens send down King Ghidrah to eat the Earth for breakfast. Luckily for us, Godzilla gathers up a whole army of his monster mates together massive scrap.

Have more men ever been dressed up in rubber suits on the same set before?





King Kong Vs. Godzilla (1962)

What lunatic brought these two together? The movie equivalent of Manchester United Vs. Liverpool, this rumble sounds like it's going to be a classic, but then fails spectacularly to live up to the top of the card billing.

All they seem to be doing is chucking the same rock at each other.





The Thing (1982)

Man is the warmest place to hide in John Carpenter's classic monster horror. This shape-shifting alien might not be smashing up a city, but he's scarier than Godzilla any day. Probably the finest monster movie ever made.


Paradise city, were the grass is green and the girls are pretty. Though the last lot did have nicer eyes.

I think Tom has a prerequisite that he can't be friends with you unless your a geek, and I am a big ol' geek. Even next to Tom, yes he may have the moniker of Geeky Tom but you betta believe I taught him everything he knows.

Back in our heyday we laid waste to numerous video games, completely sustaining the trade-in market of Sheffield. But there was one game he missed, and boy did he miss out.

Burnout Revenge was an immense game in every respect, you don't often get games that are close to perfect and you least of all expect it to be a racing game of all things. Lets get this clear, racing games suck! Bottom line. You go round and round trying to shave half a second off another repetitive lap, wow, rewarding.

So how can I say Burnout Revenge was near perfect?

I shall tell you.

Very simple really, its bloody fun. Now this was before the arm waving joy of the wii and games were much more serious and reserved back then. Burnout though just made you wwwwwoooo at your tv. Sweet.

And so we come to Burnout Paradise. A whole new beast. A short while a go I played a demo and was blown away. Burnout is simple, drive eye bleedingly fast and smash stuff. So imagine you can go eye bleedingly fast and smash stuff in a free roaming environment.

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Never crossed your mind? Course it didn't, it's insane. A free roaming driving game! Evil genius. Not just that but it works, you speed across the city stumbling (at mind blowing speed) across hidden paths and collectibles, then when you fancy something more structured you pull up at a junction, away you go.

The system just works. The important thing with this game is speed and in no time at all you can be doing any number of things from straight up races to stunt runs and road rage( thats were you have to smash fellow racers from the road). Win and you get upgrades on your license and new cars.

So your having ridiculous fun, yes, but how does it look. If I'm honest I don't care because I'm having so much fun, then I manually compact my car with the use of a boost and a wall. Sweet mother of god does it look good! In beautifully detailed slow-mo you get to witness every crushing moment. The beauty does not end there however because Paradise is skillfully rendered and even at the brake neck speeds you can't help glancing in awe. Then of course you crash, but at least it looks good.

So I'm burning through the streets of Paradise from the tight hair raising city streets to the long winding roads in the mountains when I realize something. There's some very important things missing. Key things even.

1.No crashes
2.No aftertouch
3.No reset

One of the most fun elements in any Burnout game is the crash mode. Here you aim your car down a road and try to create as much damage as possible, fun but surprisingly challenging. Paradise however doesn't have this. Why? May have something to do with the free roaming, frankly I don't give a cheese cracker. I want my crashes!

Another element from previous games is the aftertouch. This meant if you crashed during a race you could maneuver your wreck and stop other racers passing you. Very satisfying. Unless its missing, which it is.

And finally, the oh so horrendous, the oh so painful problem of no restarts. You fail a race that's it. You want to run that race again? Then you have to drive all the way back to the start. I read the idea was there was enough races available so you can just start another. Screw you I want that race, but no I have to drive all the way back, great.

So other than the restarts the game is held back by the fact it follows a near perfect game. Is that fair? Not at all. Tough luck, you shouldn't of called it Burnout then. Still I am going to play it till my eyes melt in their sockets and I'm forced to play by sound alone, like some gaming monk.

I told a lie. They didn't get rid of crash mode altogether, they have this thing called showtime, its...well its a bit silly but quite honestly its still fun. Damn it I love fun. Check this out.

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Portable Nostalgia Part 1 (The Legend of the Mystical Ninja)

I have a Nintendo DS pretty much like the rest of the world, but what I love about it is probably completely different for the reasons you love yours.

I call it something different you see, I call it my Nintendo Nostalgia Machine, or The Nintendo NM for short; see what I did there?

Basically, all the games I used to play as a kid have either been brought out in a new and improved version, or some enterprising young internet geek has created virtual emulators so I can play other games that I used to enjoy I was a Yuuth (slang for youth apparently)

Ok example number 1...or maybe week 1 as this has turned in to a weekly segment.

The Legend of the Mystical Ninja



A crazy two player platormer/RPG that introduced me to the whole anime scene, even though I didn't know it at the time.

You play either a spiky haired ninja child called Kid Ying and your mate (if you had one) played a fat blue haired Dr.Yang. The best part is when you are playing in two player mode, you can ride piggy back. From what I remember there wasn’t any advantage to this except for the ability to degrade your best friend.

The plots pretty simple, Princess Yuki has been kidnapped by the Otafu army. To save the princess, you travel across Japan partaking in different mini games, boss fights and rather strange dialogue.





Look at this boss, he was great.
You don’t see health bars on bosses that often now. They should bring them back.





You just don't have bosses like this anymore. Well, not the ones I play anyway which is probably because I only play World of Warcraft.

Well, they have made an up to date version for the DS, it hasn't come out over here so I have to make do with adverts like this, which rock by the way.




And game play videos like this...





I have actually played the Japanese version of this on my R4 (which I will leave unexplained as I could get in to trouble).

I got about 20 minutes in to the game before I gave up as I don’t speak a word of Japanese and It was probably hindering my experience. Anyway if they bring it out in the EU, then I recommend buying it. There something very endearing about the characters and the hand drawn backgrounds and the excellent music…I could go on and on.

I was going to try and fit a load of other games in to this post but it would have been huge so I'm going to split it up in to parts. I might even get the other guys and gal to join in.

So coming soon...

Children of Mana
Mario and Lugi Partners in Time
Final Fantasy 3
Scumm DS

The Lost Initiative: Season 4 Episode 1

So Lost is back...
Season 4
Episode 1

Its podcast time baby!

We are filming in a new studio this time and I get told that it will take 25 minutes from central London, so off I set.

24 minutes later and I'm still on the tube...
45 minutes later I'm on the train and my mobile starts ringing and Lee shouts down the phone:

"Where the bloody hell are you, WE HAVE THE NEW EPISODE OF LOST TO WATCH"



Which to be honest was a fair enough comment, luckily enough though I was only 10 minutes away and as soon as I had got through the door, I got sat down in front of a big screen to watch the wonder unfold.

40 minutes later...

The credits come up and we are all strangely silent, then Paul jumps in...



No, not with some crazy arm dance. He quizzes us on what we thought of the first episode in 6 months. Lee liked it, I'm a bit unsure but as I was so late we are whisked off to the studio to start the discussion and I save my misgivings till a later date.

After a brief few minutes to set up we are off.





Takes around 2 minutes for us to get in the groove, it seems like I'm talking complete rubbish. I don't know if that’s what I always sound like. I think it will take a few weeks to get in to it again and actually come up with some semi decent theories.

Lee starts talking about when he interviewed the actor who plays Sayid...says that he got him to do an Alan Partridge impression; apparently he bloody loves Partridge. I think I started shouting DAN DAN DAN at that point but they will probably cut it out.





Anyway, suddenly we come to an abrupt halt in our chat and it seems the natural point to stop. It went quickly, very quickly.

It was good to be back having a laugh with Lee and Terry.





If you want to listen to the finished product, click the link below...and pray you have itunes.

The Lost Initiative Season 4 Episode 1

I'll catch ya next week.

The New Lost episode has been seen...

One of my friends at work has seen it....Episode 1 of Season 4 to be exact.

It turned in to quite a funny set of emails...
"I wasn't impressed, but I did watch it early this morning"

“Are you generally less impressed first thing in the day, then get more optimistic as the day progresses?”

“Generally, yes. Being on the train at 7.30 has a stark effect on my good humour and it takes a while to wear off”

So it’s not all doom and gloom.

I will let you know tonight what I think...or you could just wait for Sunday for the podcast =)